Shaughna Phillips has come a long way since she walked into the Love Island villa in Cape Town four years ago looking for an everlasting relationship.
Now a mum of to one-year-year old Lucia, the Londoner is embracing her new life and enjoying every minute of being a mother, but admits it's taken her a year to "get her groove back" after giving birth in April last year.
Having Lucia has also made Shaughna reflect a lot on her own relationship with her dad Eddie, a black cab driver, who died in 2016 after an 18-month battle with pancreatic cancer. Speaking exclusively to OK! ahead of Celebration Day on Monday, 27 May, she emotionally opens up about feeling like herself again, Lucia's relationship with her own dad (Billy Webb, who is currently in prison for drug offences), and what she now finds "uncomfortable" about Love Island...
Hi Shaughna! Can you tell us a little bit about Celebration Day and what it means to you?
It's about remembering and celebrating loved ones who aren't here with us any more. I talk so openly about my dad, Eddie, but I think there's still a taboo around death and grief, and there shouldn't be. Not everyone feels comfortable talking to someone about someone they've lost but I think they should be, because just because the physical part of that person isn't here any more, they still existed.
And it's even more important to me now because I've got a little girl and I want her to know her grandad, just as if he was here. Even though we should celebrate them every day, life gets in the way, so it's nice to have a day dedicated to it.
What do you plan to do to mark the day for your dad?
After Love Island I bought my dad a plaque at Arsenal stadium [Emirates Stadium] because he was a big Arsenal fan. It was such an honour to be able to do that for him, so that's where I'm going to spend the day. For me, having a day that isn't like a birthday, which is full of memories of previous times, is really special.
What was your relationship like with your dad?
He was my best friend, we were like two peas in a pod! I was a big, big tomboy until I was about 14 and he's probably the main reason for that. We used to go to the football with each other but I haven't actually been back to watch an Arsenal game since my dad died because we always used to go with each other. I was so lucky to have such a good relationship with him, and I was actually with him at the appointment where they told him he had cancer. My mum and brother were on holiday but we'd stayed back because my dad was ill and I said "I'll stay and fly out later with you", so for a little while it was just me and him that knew. He wanted to enjoy that holiday with my mum without her knowing straight away.
I was 22 which his young, but he must've known I could handle it, and I could, and yes it was awful, but to think that he trusted me with that is a badge of honour for me.
Do you think your relationship with your dad has influenced the way you see Lucia's relationship with her dad, Billy?
Completely. I was denied time with my dad and I would never stand in the way of that with Lucia. I don't feel the need to justify why I want them to have a relationship to anyone, but if they did want to hear it, I think that because my dad was the best person in the world to me, Lucia's dad will the same for her despite anything else that's happened.
I'm glad they have that relationship and my dad would be an advocate for me doing anything I can to strengthen it.
You've always seemed so resilient, do you think that comes from losing your dad so young?
Yes, nothing is worse than that. So when people come out and say things like "you're fat", I just think, "I've literally sat in a room and been told that my dad has cancer, do you think calling me fat is going to hurt me? You're sorely mistaken."
You went away to Ibiza recently without Lucia, how was it?
I felt guilty leaving her and I thought I'd be a nervous wreck but actually it was the best trip ever! I really enjoyed it. or the first time in a year I just felt like Shaughna, and not a mum. I feel like I'm getting my groove back now. Don't get me wrong though, I took her blanket with me and looked at photos of her the whole time on the plane, and it was amazing getting back to her!
Love Island is coming back very soon, is there anything you'd change about the show?!
I'm definitely going to be watching it, but the only thing I think the age limit [currently 18] should maybe be 20 or 21. It's sometimes a little bit uncomfortable watching a 29-year-old boy crack on with a 19-year-old. girl. Even 21 seems young, but 18 is so young! At 21 you've got a bit more of a wise head on your shoulders. It would be nice to see not just one person over 25, but a good few of them.
